I believe it is an honour to witness a death. To sit with a being at the end of it’s life.
Especially with humans, towards the end of life there is a hope that we will be able to say goodbye to the ones we love and to those who have supported us. I have heard often from those who did not have the chance to say goodbye that they wish they could have had the chance to share their appreciation and to express their love. I have also heard time and time again from those who had time to say goodbye, that there is never enough said, but that they were happy to have been there with their person when they died.
I was given the honour of sitting with an individual as they died, not long ago. There was time to sit with family and friends, to share in memories, and to say what could be said. It was joyful and heartbreaking for all. To sit with this individual, for everyone to say their goodbyes, and to witness this individual’s last breath – it was honouring and humbling, to say the least. I was grateful to have spent time with this individual in their journey of life, and to have bared witness to this individual’s death. Witnessing this individual’s life as it left the body, I will forever remember and appreciate.
If you have sat with someone during their death, or wished you could have, and need to talk to someone, I invite you to visit my contact me page to schedule an appointment.
You may notice that throughout my website and blog posts, that I will repeatedly use the terms ‘death’, ‘dead’, and ‘dying’. This is not to remind you of the impact you may be currently feeling, but to help normalize the use of those words. I believe that using words or phrases that are used frequently in our current society might ‘soften the blow’ for others, but I do not want to minimize what has happened in your life. Too many times in our society do we use words or phrases that lighten the impact of things that have impacted us greatly, in hopes of sparing others of our pain. Your pains, your loss, your fears do not need to be softened for me. I want to talk about the impact you are feeling, the grief and mourning you are experiencing, and at times, the unbearable pain that you feel.
Additionally, in our current society, we have taken these words out of our language to help ‘ease the pain’ to children and teens. However, as you can read in my post ‘Talking with Children and Teens about death and the loss of someone in their life’, it is very important to use the proper terms when talking about death and dying, as to not to confuse or create fear in our little ones who might not understand what ‘gone’ or ‘has passed away’ mean. If you are curious about my perspective, or would like help with the upcoming or past death, please connect with me through my contact me page to request an appointment, as I would very much appreciate the opportunity to support you or answer any questions, comments or concerns you may have.
As our world becomes further integrated and mixed, so do our traditions and options. In the past we may have experienced one or two different types of services, but today – we have a multitude of options that may represent our person more appropriately. Having these conversations before the death of your person can help to alleviate the planning after the death while grieving. It is my hope that something, anything from this blog may help you and those around you plan a service. Remember that you do not have to go this journey alone. Please feel free to contact me to schedule an appointment.
How do you say goodbye to those you love? How do you come to terms knowing that you will no longer be? How do you reconcile the ‘I wish I had’s…’ and the ‘I wish I could have changed…’? As you proceed through the end of your days, I want to thank you for the life that you have lived, and hope that something, anything from this blog may help you come to a place of peace before your passing. Remember that you do not have to go this journey alone. Please feel free to contact me to schedule an appointment.
Knowing that someone in your life is going to die can be an emotionally draining time – your life sits in suspension, waiting. This can feel quite lonely and isolating but it doesn’t have to be. My hope is that something, anything from this blog may help you and support you during this strenuous time. Remember that you do not have to go this journey alone. Please feel free to contact me to schedule an appointment.